Thursday Thirteen - CIA: Computer Industry Acronyms

- CD-ROM: Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
- PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
- ISDN: It Still Does Nothing
- MIPS: Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
- DOS: Defunct Operating System
- WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
- OS/2: Obsolete Soon, Too
- PnP: Plug and Pray
- APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
- IBM: I Blame Microsoft
- MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
- COBOL: Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
- MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs



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[Source: The JOKES Blog]

Thursday Thirteen - You know you work for the Government when...

- When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie.

- You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.

- Your biggest loss from a system crash is you lose your best jokes.

- Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.

- You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.

- It no longer amazes you that computer security is more important than having computers.

- Your office computer was just upgraded to a 200 MHz Pentium this year.

- Computer specialists know less about computers than your teenager.

- Lunch is like another scheduled meeting, only shorter.

- You and your coequals always consume the free food left over from VIP meetings.

- It's dark when you drive to and from work.

- You're forced to park your car a mile from the office because of all the commanders, customers, designated contractor, VIP's, employees of the month/quarter/year and visitor, parking spaces by the main entrance.



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[Source: The JOKES Blog]

Thursday Thirteen! You know you're old when...

- Everything hurts , and what doesn't hurt, doesn't work anyway.

- The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals.

- You feel like you really hung one one the night before, and you were in bed asleep by eight.

- You get winded playing chess.

- Your children begin to look middle-aged.

- You join a health club and don't go.

- You begin to outlive enthusiasm.

- Your mind makes contracts your body can't meet.

- You know all the answers, but nobody asks the questions.

- You look forward to a dull evening.

- Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 years ago today!"

- You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.

- You stop looking forward to your next birthday.



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[Source: The JOKES Blog]

BACK!!!

Aaaaand.... the JOKES Blog... after a MASSIVELY long break... is BACK!!

Brace yourself against a WEALTH of hilarious jokes... and enjoy laughing :)

- The Bizarre Jokester

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[Source: The JOKES Blog]